Thursday, February 24, 2005
Work has been keping my extremely busy, which is good because then I spend less time thinking about food and how gross it is. It's about to get even busier for me with work as we are about to start planning one of my departments big events. One in April and the other in August. That August one sure will be fun! Great!
I did make it to the gym twice so far this week. Yea! Today I got a personal trainer. It's so out of our budget, but Chad really wants me to do it until I get in a groove. I've really been wanting to do it as well, I just didn't think we could afford it. I'm only going to go twice a week, so that isn't THAT bad. I know it will really help with delivery and recovery, so I guess it's worth the expense.
Well, I'm of to nap....Yes, it's 6 p.m. We are having a special evening sermon tonight at Church, and I'm so tired that I don't even want to go. I have about an hour to sleep and get up there....Nighty Night!!
Monday, February 21, 2005
I've noticed the proestrogen bloat is decreasing, however the rest of the bloating is horrible. I told Chad on Friday that if he placed me in water, I would float!! I'm so full of air and gas, its awful! I feel like a walking farting/burping machine. I know, how unladylike of me, but I seem to have no control. I swear I'm so full of it that its now forcing its way out!! It's so humbling!
I seem to be really tired again. All I want to do is sleep. I slept all weekend. Well, we got a lot done, we just had to work around my naps!
My boobs have officially started to grow. I had to buy a bigger bra this weekend. I was pretty excited about that...I've never bought a C bra before. I'm excited to see just how big they'll get.
Food. My eating has gotten better...and worse. I'm eating more protein again (good). If I don't smell it, I can eat it. I'm happy with that. I still haven't cooked...I think its been something like a month since I have cooked. What's gotten worse then? What I'm eating. All pastas and crap. Nutrional foods just don't have the same appeal. Normally this wouldn't be such a bad thing, but with the moving and being sick and everything else, I've hardly seen the gym.
But all of that is changing! I'm purposing to make it to the gym 3 days (at least) this week. I'm also going to stop eating upstairs in the cafeteria (hello, grease). I'm going to start leaving for lunch and buying more salads with protein. I don't want to get fat! I will not let it happen. Even though I know weight gain is totally okay right now, I know eating McDonalds isn't the best for me. I will overcome temptation and aversions!
Next Tuesday is my next big Dr. appointment. I'm really looking forward to it.
Tuesday, February 15, 2005
Monday I had a little surprise. Spotting. Now I promised to be very honest in my blog, so if you don't want to read the gory girl stuff, move on. I've read in plenty of books that some spotting in the first trimester is normal. I always thought that if it happened I would remain calm. Not so much the case.
When I went to the bathroom I noticed brown in my panties, okay, I can handle that. Then when I wiped (I told you this was going to be gory) it was more red. Now brown I could do, red...that's a little scary...but still very little was red. I ran straight to my cell phone and called the doctor. They asked me if I could come in that afternoon for a little check up, not a problem. After making the call I called Chad and made a few more trips to the ladies room to see if I was leaking. Nothing.
It was then I began to think I might have overreacted. I mean, I had read about this again and again. And then I started thinking how the doctor wasn't in any real rush to see me. Besides, no matter what, if I call with a problem, they are going to want to see me for liability reasons. I mean, if they didn't and something did go wrong, I guess I could go after them. Then I started praying, and felt this peace come over me that everything was fine. So, I cancelled the appointment.
I haven't had any other red, just a little brown, since yesterday. My next appointment is in two weeks. I've determined if I see red again, I'll go in, but for now I'm okay. I feel like I will know if something is wrong with my body. Most people say that if you have seen the heartbeat, that's a good indication that everything will be fine....and boy, have I seen a heartbeat. :)
Morning sickness returned this morning. I believe that last week went so well because I was so stopped up I couldn't smell anything. The moment I began to smell again, is the moment I remembered what m/s felt like. Hopefully it'll leave just as fast as it came back!
Prayers are appreciated!!
Thursday, February 10, 2005
When I went to the doctor, they gave me an antibiotic and told me a few OTC things to purchase. Before letting me go, they did an ultrasound. Now, I thought this was even weirder than going to the OB for a cold, but I was up for it. She said that in the event that I went home and something happened they needed proof that the baby was fine at the time of visit. Makes sense, I guess.
I was pretty sad that I was going to have another look at the baby without Chad, but how was I to know? Thank goodness I'm skinny, because this time she was able to do it over my belly (as opposed to inside..ick). Oh my, the difference a week makes! Last week Baby G was 4mm long...this week he/she was 11mm!! We almost tripled in size! Also, last week, she asked if we could see the heartbeat, I couldn't...but yesterday that thing was beating away. It was so neat. I was amazed at how fast the little heart was beating. She said, on average, it's beating at twice the speed of mine. Wow! She let me watch it for a quite some time as she captured several pictures to track the growth. Last week we looked like a line, this week it was a little blob. :) But a cute blob. I was so sad that Chad wasn't there to see it.
I'm still reeling in how neat it was to see the heartbeat. To know that something really is growing in me. It's so fascinating.
I also asked her about the pudge that I'm getting. Its apparently proestrogen bloating (not gas bloating). She said it'll go away in the next few weeks, but then I'll be starting to form a belly. It was comforting to hear her say, "at least you are skinny enough..." because Lord knows I have not been feeling skinny at all!! It's going to be a real adjustment to gain weight like I'm about to.
After getting all of the drugs, I went home and camped out on the couch watching none other than A Baby Story. Stupid decision....I'm terrified. Labor does not look fun, exciting or easy. In fact at one point I cringed knowing that I have to go through that soon. *ugh* I mean, ugh... At least I have eight more months to prepare.
Tuesday, February 08, 2005
Yesterday, I had cereal and chocolate milk for breakfast. Then for lunch I had half of a chicken salad sandwich with a pickle. I ate an apple as a snack on my way home from work. Dinner, was exceptionally bland, noodles with butter. I swear, I'm turning into one large carb! No heartburn or vomiting. :) YEAH!!!
I love the prenatal's that I'm taking. DuetDHA by StuartNatal. Others make people very sick and constipated (not to gross anyone out), but this pill helps ease things. The problem is NONE are covered by my insurance, so I'm on my own. I called the pharmacy to see how much the one I'm on costs...$35. The rest of the samples I have run around $25. So, I ask, is ten dollars worth it?? I'm thinking it is, but I haven't given the others a fair shot yet. I'll have to see how the next week goes.
Speaking of insurance...a little rant. When I started working here I signed up for the HMO (EPO) program. Since we are such a large company, we are on this executive program that allows us to visit a specialist without a referral. Nice. Well, I also signed up to avoid deductibles. Then I noticed that to have a baby it would only cost $250!!! WooHoo!! Well, not so woohoo anymore, as of January 1st our policy changed, I'll now owe 10% of the cost. That stinks!! Stupid insurance companies!
Clothing. I know it's just the bloat and not the baby, but OMG I feel huge. My once flat and sexy tummy is looking a little pudgier (sp). My jeans are starting to cut me off when sitting at my desk. I'm starting to notice pant imprints on my skin when I go to the restroom. I hate this. I'm not looking forward to going through that in-between fat and pregnant stage. The really bad thing is these are the jeans that I just bought on my birthday (December) that were a little too big at the time. Size 8! I'm terrified I will never have my figure again. I feel so vain saying that, but it is so true!
Yipee, mom just called and they have an extra ticket to Tony'n'Tina's wedding tonight at Bass Hall. I'm so excited. I haven't gone "out" like that since Cirque in December with the hubby. I'm so excited. I wonder what I'll wear....
Monday, February 07, 2005
I'm feeling so much better today than I have been. I got up this morning and actually made my lunch! :) I never thought that would be such an accomplishment. And to top it all off, I got a great nights sleep! It was the first night in about four nights that I didn't have to sleep sitting up. YEA!!!
As for this weekend. Well, Friday I got pretty sick after eating chicken fried steak. I don't even know why I ate chicken fried steak. I haven't had it in years, but it was the only thing that looked good on the menu. Not even my fail-safe salad looked good. Needless to say, the grease in my tummy was not a good thing and I ended up vomiting before bed. :(
Saturday, I got up pretty early (around 8) and watched Pretty Woman (that movie never gets old). Then, I went and hung out with mom and ran errands, all the while pretty sick. Nothing sounded good, yet I felt like I was hungry. It was miserable. Finally we went to Jason's Deli. Mom was kind enough to let me order two dishes and decide which one I wanted once they came. If only every meal would be so easy. I ate the broccoli cheese soup. Again, got sick.
Saturday night, mom made Chad prime rib for his birthday. I brought my own dinner, chicken salad sandwich, mac'n'cheese, and a baked potato. How sad. I felt like I was five! I was stupid and put some bacon bits on the potato...and that made me sick. Will I ever get a clue?
So by Sunday, I learned my lesson....No grease, no soda or carbonated beverages, no spicy foods, and only eat half your portion (especially when out). We had a birthday lunch after church with Chad's family at a freaking mexican food restaurant. I was so upset. I ordered a quesadilla and ate only two little sections of it. I'm telling you, I have a serious fear of food these days.
Then later we had a Superbowl party at our house...with tons of salsa, queso, hot wings, and other spicy foods. I nibbled on crackers. The party went really well. I was a bit nervous about having enough seating and food, but it all worked out in the end. The only bad thing was the guest bathroom toilet didn't get fixed in time, so everyone had to use mine. *ack* And now ours is leaking too! Ugh, days like that make me wish we bought a newer home (eventhough I love ours).
The good news about Sunday was that I never got sick! :) I managed to go to bed without having a Mylanta cocktail all day! YEA!!
Friday, February 04, 2005
Yes, you heard me. If you know me very well at all you know this is TOTALLY out of character for me. I normally love food. No longer, I tell you, no longer.
Lets take today for example. I'm driving to work today and hear the McMuffin commercial. I almost had to pull over to gag. It was the most disgusting thing I had heard of....still is, thinking about it makes me want to gag. The McGriddle, my onetime love, nasty. Magazine ads, TV ads, radio ads, and the like send me in to gag-land...the bad thing is, they are everywhere!!
Then, lunch time. I dread lunch. It seems to be my worst meal of the day. Everyday its something different. Whatever did it for me the day before, sends me running to the bathroom the next. Yesterday I had the best baked potato for lunch. I swore that today the same thing would be good since its relatively a bland food (to read why I'm against spicy foods read yesterday). Not true. I went up there got my potato, sat down at my desk and had to force myself to eat it. I need nutrition, I need to eat...this has become the most complicated thing in life!
Smells. Uck. Whoever told me that I would become sensitive to smells completely understated the situation. I don't even think I can go into it because thinking about smelling will make me sick.
I'm beginning to think I'm part crazy. I keep thinking this is all a mental thing. Partly because I remember back when dieting I would tell Chad, "I can't eat it, I just can't." And he would say, "That's all mental." I see now, that in truth, I could have probably ate the stinking chicken. So, I wonder, could I still eat these foods?
It's actually getting to be a pretty expensive habit. I never know what I'll want therefore I have to eat out (if I'm out). I go to the store everyday to buy whatever it is that I think will settle the beast inside me for the day.
Which brings me to my next topic (or should I soapbox) today...I need to start eating earlier. Since my new bedtime is 8pm, I really shouldn't be having dinner at 7. My food just ends up keeping me up all night long. And that is just plain miserable!
I don't want this whole blog to be so negative. I mean yesterday was the best day I can remember that I've had since being pregnant. (Probably because I got 13 hours of sleep) I just want to keep record of what I'm really going through each day. Everyday I'm learning something new that helps the next day. I mean, who would have thought eating crackers in bed would help?!? So, please don't take all of this as complaining. I think of it as learning and expressing. :) I couldn't be happier to be having a baby.
Thursday, February 03, 2005
I got home and went straight to bed...at about 5pm. Chad woke me up when he got home from church with a cute card, some Mylanta, coffee ice cream, and regular saltines. I love him so much. He's amazing! I guess I remember getting up and eating ice cream, but not that well. I was soon tucked back in bed and sleeping soundly, with no heartburn.
I've been noticing that I wake up a lot during the night. Sometimes its to pee, others its because Chad seems to suddenly want it 80 degrees in the house, and sometimes I just wake up and sit. It's very weird. Dana says its preparing me for having the baby.
I was late to work today. I guess I really needed 13 hours of sleep, because I couldn't get out of bed until six. I believe my alarm started going off at 5am. I'm still in a daze. The good news is I was only 30min late to work. I was promptly reminded that I need to make up for it ASAP, as if I wasn't already. I guess I'll only have a 30min lunch today.
Today is Chad's birthday. I think I'll by him a card from the baby....or is that cheesy to do already?!?!
Wednesday, February 02, 2005
Yup, that's right, we saw Baby G. Not much to look at really. It was 4mm long, about the size of a lentil bean. She said she could see a flutter, which would mean the heart is beating. It was all so cool. I now feel pregnant because I've seen it. Well, I guess I've been "feeling" very pregnant, but you know what I mean. They gave us the picture and I couldn't stop staring at it. It's amazing that that's how we all start out.
I actually felt better Tuesday than I have felt in a long time. I wasn't even needing a nap during lunch... although I still took one. I ate pretty bad too, grilled cheese and ham with fries for lunch. It was the only thing that sounded good. After my appointment I made up for my greasy lunch by going to the gym. It felt really good to be active, however I did notice I'm getting tired a lot faster.
I was in the mood for tacos last night, and why pay for them if I can make them? The bad thing was we hadn't moved my pots, pans, and cooking utensils yet, so I had to make a trip to the apartment before heading home. Blah, I can't wait until everything is moved.
I've also determined that I'm not allowed to go to the store anymore because of my cravings. I bought the most random stuff, and most of it had ZERO nutritional value. Oh well, guess Chad will have to get to know our store better.
Last night was kinda rough because I was stricken with heartburn....I still have it. I got up around 2 am in so much pain. I walked around the house a few times before getting back into bed. I had to sleep sitting up. I still feel like my insides are on fire. I'm not sure what I'll do for lunch...I'm terrified to eat anything. I didn't go to bed on a full stomach or anything, and I heard that is normally why people get HB at night. I dunno, but I want it gone!!
The official due date is September 25th!!